Saturday, February 14, 2009

Popcicle Man

If you're offended by this, you're not wrong.

Monday, February 09, 2009

General Dynamics

I realized this past weekend that I hadn't done a two-minute rock opera yet about a mechanical engineer who steals a tank. So I fixed that (there's a General Dynamcs tank plant near Detroit that we used to drive past whenever we'd visit our grandparents, so that's the Michigan connection).

This features Alchemy, Minimonsta, Jamcussion, SonikSynth 2, and a backwards guitar chord (that I played all by myself!).

He's thinking about getting the band back together
But he knows there never really was a band
He found a funny video he'd like to show his son
But he won't see him until next weekend.
And it's too early to get excited about going home
According to the 20-year clock up on the shelf
Not that there's anything to get excited about
And these brackets won't design themeselves.

General Dynamics
You can't be quiet, you can't be loud
General Dynamics
Don't deny it, stand out from the crowd
Because when you look back at all your time
and find that from it all you shrank
That's the time to break out of line
And steal yourself a tank.

Maybe it was a problem with AutoCAD
Maybe just missing the life he'd never had,
After years of being nothing he just wanted to be bad,
And that night he was working late.
He had a friend in the guard at the shack
They'd gone to school together many years back
And so just by faking a heart attack
He subdued him and made it through the factory gate.

Fire that bad boy up
Slam that hatch door shut
They'll finally listen, today.

General Dynamics
Quiet time is over now
General Dynamics
Never liked this fac'try anyhow
Like Hell! the Earth belongs to the weak
Or to those whom it destroys
Maybe they'll listen when you speak
If your tank backs it up with noise.

None of this was really necessary
Could have avoided the run-in with the military
And the Page One obituary
With a little general dynamics.